Oh look, an update ...
Yes, I figured it was about time I'd give a proper update.
I'm not even sure where to begin ... not that it's a bad thing.
Well, for one, I froze school (in which, I go back on March 3rd) due to issues with caregiver. I couldn't find a daycare for weeks, and so I missed all allowed hours + she got a really bad flu, which was conjoined with teething. Worst week ever. Fever going up and down, for days, 2 trips to the hospital. I hate seeing her sick, let alone, not being able to make her feel better. Our nights were long, she never left my arms.
She's doing great now. Growing fast, her vocabulary (understanding) is increasing:
-"hi"
-"bubye"
-"momy"
-"daddy"
-"look"
-"okay"
-"up up"
-"doggie"
-"baby"
-"bird"
-"kitty"
-"no"
-"yes"
And lately, I'd put her to down for the night in her bed. Come back, and find her asleep in mine ...
Mid January, was a sad day for me.
I was forced to moved out and back in with my parents. Which meant, getting rid of so much 'junk' - I cried. Not because of moving, but because I felt like I failed again, I failed Naima as a mother, I failed my parents as a daughter, I failed. I felt so guilty, ashamed, and crappy because I had to move back in with my parents, I guess I wasn't ready to be on my own again, yet. I am so grateful to have them. They were there when I needed them the most. I don't know what I would have done without them.
Ie: Naima throws a fit because I won't let her eat sweets before dinner. She throws herself to the floor and screams. My option: talk to her firmly to stop, and explain to her why she can't have sweets. My parents option: Run to her and "baby" her, then give her sweets.
What I'm afraid of, is when she is old enough to understand and says to me: "But grandma lets me" - it's one thing to spoil, it's another letting me be the mother of my child. All I ask is, if they want to give her something - "Let's ask mommy if you can have this ... "
I'm not asking much. I'm not saying "No, you can't spoil her!" That's what grandparents are for! But in my case, it's different, we live together, and they should be helping me, not making me look like the bad guy.
====================================
These days, Naima and I are just enjoying mother and daughter moments. The weather is helping a bit. Sunny days to come along and more fun outdoors.
I'm glad I now live in the suburban area of the city, only because, more playgrounds near by!!
Best time ever!! Especially at her age, where all they want is run around, be crazy and scream at the top of their lungs, I love this part! I am so eager for spring/summer season. Numerous trips to the playground, walks, beaches, sandcastle building etc. This year is going to be sooo much fun and I cannot wait to cherish them.
I'm not even sure where to begin ... not that it's a bad thing.
Well, for one, I froze school (in which, I go back on March 3rd) due to issues with caregiver. I couldn't find a daycare for weeks, and so I missed all allowed hours + she got a really bad flu, which was conjoined with teething. Worst week ever. Fever going up and down, for days, 2 trips to the hospital. I hate seeing her sick, let alone, not being able to make her feel better. Our nights were long, she never left my arms.
She's doing great now. Growing fast, her vocabulary (understanding) is increasing:
-"hi"
-"bubye"
-"momy"
-"daddy"
-"look"
-"okay"
-"up up"
-"doggie"
-"baby"
-"bird"
-"kitty"
-"no"
-"yes"
And lately, I'd put her to down for the night in her bed. Come back, and find her asleep in mine ...
====================================
Mid January, was a sad day for me.
I was forced to moved out and back in with my parents. Which meant, getting rid of so much 'junk' - I cried. Not because of moving, but because I felt like I failed again, I failed Naima as a mother, I failed my parents as a daughter, I failed. I felt so guilty, ashamed, and crappy because I had to move back in with my parents, I guess I wasn't ready to be on my own again, yet. I am so grateful to have them. They were there when I needed them the most. I don't know what I would have done without them.
====================================
It's been 2 weeks now. Adapting to living back at 'home' is slowly getting into place. There challenges between my parents and the ways in which I choose to raise Naima. I don't mind them spoiling her. It's just more difficult since we live in the same roof. I can only tolerate it to a certain extent.Ie: Naima throws a fit because I won't let her eat sweets before dinner. She throws herself to the floor and screams. My option: talk to her firmly to stop, and explain to her why she can't have sweets. My parents option: Run to her and "baby" her, then give her sweets.
What I'm afraid of, is when she is old enough to understand and says to me: "But grandma lets me" - it's one thing to spoil, it's another letting me be the mother of my child. All I ask is, if they want to give her something - "Let's ask mommy if you can have this ... "
I'm not asking much. I'm not saying "No, you can't spoil her!" That's what grandparents are for! But in my case, it's different, we live together, and they should be helping me, not making me look like the bad guy.
====================================
These days, Naima and I are just enjoying mother and daughter moments. The weather is helping a bit. Sunny days to come along and more fun outdoors.
I'm glad I now live in the suburban area of the city, only because, more playgrounds near by!!
Best time ever!! Especially at her age, where all they want is run around, be crazy and scream at the top of their lungs, I love this part! I am so eager for spring/summer season. Numerous trips to the playground, walks, beaches, sandcastle building etc. This year is going to be sooo much fun and I cannot wait to cherish them.
